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Watch
out for someone who seems too good to be true.
Begin by communicating solely via Match.com
email, then look for odd behavior or inconsistencies.
The person at the other end may not be who
or what he or she says. Trust your instincts.
If anything makes you uncomfortable, walk
away for your own safety and protection. |
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All
correspondence between Match.com members takes
place through our double-blind system, ensuring
your true identity is protected until you
decide to reveal it. Never include your last
name, email address, home address, phone number,
place of work or any other identifying information
in your free
profile or initial messages. When corresponding
with another Match.com member, turn off your
email signature file. Stop communicating with
anyone who pressures you for personal information
or attempts in any way to trick you into revealing
it. |
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Careful,
thoughtful decisions generally yield better
dating results. Guard against trusting the
untrustworthy; suitors must earn your trust
gradually, through consistently honorable,
forthright behavior. Take all the time you
need to test for a trustworthy person and
pay careful attention along the way. If you
suspect someone is lying, he or she probably
is, so act accordingly. Be responsible about
romance, and don't fall in love at the click
of a mouse. Don't become prematurely intimate
with someone, even if that intimacy only occurs
online. If you mutually decide to cross the
point of no return, be smart and protect yourself.
The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
provide some of the most current information
available about sexually transmitted diseases
and preserving your health. |
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Because
privacy is of the highest importance at Match.com,
we do not require our members to submit to
background checks. We do, however, encourage
members to do their own research on potential
love matches. We recommend getting as much
info as possible by asking questions, utilizing
Internet search engines (try http://www.ask.com/) and most importantly,
using common sense. Nothing is 100% reliable,
just remember to use your head as well as
your heart. (By the way, if you want to look
into background checks on your own, simply
perform a search using your favorite Internet
search engine - many companies supply them!) |
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A
photo will give you a good idea of the person's
appearance, which may prove helpful in achieving
a gut feeling. In fact, it's best to view
several images of someone in various settings:
casual, formal, indoor and outdoors. If all
you hear are excuses about why you can't see
a photo, consider that he or she has something
to hide. |
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A
phone call can reveal much about a person's
communication and social skills. Consider
your security and do not reveal your personal
phone number to a stranger. Try a cell phone
number instead or use local telephone blocking
techniques to prevent your phone number from
appearing in Caller ID. Only furnish your
phone number when you feel completely comfortable. |
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The
beauty of meeting and relating online is that
you can collect information gradually, later
choosing whether to pursue the relationship
in the offline world. You never are obligated
to meet anyone, regardless of your level on
online intimacy. And even if you decide to
arrange a meeting, you always have the right
to change your mind. It's possible that your
decision to keep the relationship anonymous
is based on a hunch that you can't logically
explain. Trust yourself. Go with your instincts. |
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Pay
attention to displays of anger, intense frustration
or attempts to pressure or control you. Acting
in a passive-aggressive manner, making demeaning
or disrespectful comments or any physically
inappropriate behavior are all red flags.
You should be concerned if your date exhibits
any of the following behavior without providing
an acceptable explanation:
- Provides inconsistent information about
age, interests, appearance, marital status,
profession, employment, etc.
- Refuses to speak to you on the phone
after establishing ongoing, online intimacy.
- Fails to provide direct answers to direct
questions.
- Appears significantly different in person
from his or her online persona.
- Never introduces you to friends, professional
associates or family members.
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When
you choose to meet offline, always tell a
friend where you are going and when you will
return. Leave your date's name and telephone
number with your friend. Never arrange for
your date to pick you up at home. Provide
your own transportation, meet in a public
place at a time with many people around (a
familiar restaurant or coffee shop is often
a good choice), and when the date is over,
leave on your own as well. Refrain from drinking
excessively, as it could impair your ability
to make good decisions. If at some point you
and your date decide to move to another location,
take your own car. When the timing is appropriate,
thank your date for getting together and say
goodbye. |
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If
you are flying in from another city, arrange
for your own car and hotel room. Do not disclose
the name of your hotel and never allow your
date to make the arrangements for you. Rent
a car at the airport and drive directly to
your hotel. Call your date from the hotel
or meet at the location you have already agreed
to. If the location seems inappropriate or
unsafe, go back to your hotel. Try to contact
your date at that location or leave a message
on a home machine. Always make sure a friend
or family member knows your plans and has
your contact information. And if possible,
carry a cell phone at all times. |
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Never
do anything you feel unsure about. If you
are in any way afraid of your date, use your
best judgment to diffuse the situation and
get out of there. Excuse yourself long enough
to call a friend for advice, ask someone else
on the scene for help or slip out the back
door and drive away. If you feel you are in
danger, call the police; it's always better
to be safe than sorry. Never worry or feel
embarrassed about your behavior; your safety
is much more important than one person's opinion
of you.
While liars, cheaters and imposters certainly
ply their craft on the Web, you'll also find
them in nightclubs and offline dating services,
cocktail parties or even sitting across from
you at your local café. Regardless
of where you meet someone, dating is never
a risk-free activity, but a little caution
will reduce your risk in matters of the heart.
Now it's time for safety-conscious you to
use a quick
search to find a quality date! |
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